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Sunday 5 October 2014

I Hadn’t Actually Planned To Post Something But Then I RE-Watched Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda And…

Photo by Eva Rinaldi 
under Creative Commons LIcense, CC BY-SA 2.0

And I thought her music video was post worthy. And now here I am. The first time I watched Anaconda was actually a couple of weeks ago.

So, I was strolling on Youtube, listening to some music and then before listening to Can’t Forget to Remember you by Shakira feat Rihanna, there was an advert for Nicki Minaj latest music video Anaconda.

Of course like any innocent human who reasonably like the coloured Lady Gaga, I decided to listen to Anaconda.

The Lord didn’t preserve me this time. I watched a brand new type of music video: pornA$$ography!!

PornA$$ography as defined by TBC (The Big Encyclopedia aka Carla’s mind): Dance moves mainly performed by  popstar or wannabbee popstar suffering from Fame Whoring or Try Hard syndrome in their music videos . This particular dance involves a lot of provocative movement realized with the butt to the effect of drawing a lot of attention to the dancer. Introduced in a milder and less interesting form by Miley Cyrus back in her Twerking days.

I saw Nicki high five some of her dancers’ bum with her own big yansh, move her  protuberant (and more than likely surgically enhanced) butt and make a lap dance on Drake.

And at some point she was rocking a pink sweatpants that was so tight, her derriere was the only thing you noticed. Her very conspicuous pink thong also made you check that area out.

I can only venture how Drake must have felt while Nicki was parading around him.

“Mayday, Mayday! Houston we’ve in danger! Ahrgg! The pen is straightening!!!” or something like that comes to my mind. But what I know is that I was mesmerized by Nicki’s lap dance or rather by her butt.

I’m a girl pretty confident in her sexual preference, and yet I couldn’t stop staring.

I swear that backside’s got a life on his own! I felt like it was going to come out of my laptop screen and punch me in the face.

It was so bold, so round, so big and it COULD bounce.

More than the butts overload, Nicki’s pink thong and pink sweatpants combo or her little dance for Drake, do you want to know what choked me the most? Nicki’s derriere can actually BOUNCE *shake head in amazement*.

Yep, when she shakes it, it doesn’t stay glued to her back like Beyonce’s wig on her head.  It actually goes UP and DOWN. You know, like a normal butt. 

Okay, okay let’s get serious for a minute.

I must admit that Anaconda is the perfect ode to Sir Mix a lot’s “Baby got’s back” and Nicki looked great in the video. The first time I heard Anaconda I wasn't a fan, but now, I'm kind of liking it. I was also impressed by the Young Money's rapper twerking game.

AND my prayer finally got answered because she finally got rid of her ratchety Razpunsel- fairy gone wrong-Stephani Joanne Angelina Germanotta (Lady Gaga) inspired wigs.

I’m not sure if I could recommand Anaconda to children under the age of 12 and church people, though.

4 comments:

  1. I love Nicki Minaj. I think she is just so controversial and amazing. She has so many great things to say about women in her interviews and she is quite the feminist, using herself to point out the inconsistencies between men and women. When I first saw the Anaconda video, I was laughing too hard to really focus on it, but I want to go back and re-watch it because Nicki is awesome. :-)

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    1. Anaconda one of the funniest music video I have ever seen. What I like about NIcki is that she doesn't seems to take herself seriously. I think you're right, despite her "controversial" look, she's actually a good role model.

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  2. Haha, this is the perfect post for someone like me. I was afraid this was going to be a post slamming Nicki Minaj, but I should know you aren't someone to do that! I actually really like a lot of her music, and I think she does have a lot of things to say. As for the video... at least we know she is comfortable in her own skin and confident with herself! Reading this made me laugh so hard, haha xD It *BOUNCES* xD

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    1. I'm glad my post made you laugh! That's the effect I wanted it to have on people. Lol, I was one of these person who genuinely thought her butt couldn't move, so I was in shock when I saw her twerking, haha. People tend to forget it because of her look, but Nicki is a very good rapper. I also like lots of her music, Moment For Life remains my favorite song from her. And I enjoy watching her videos because they're always funny. She's most definitely VERY comfortable with her own skin, lol!

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